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Jacks was despite like some untrustworthy gamemasters said a hardworking man. His schedule was almost always filled so much that he would have to double the day hours to complete it but thankfully he could take creative liberties because not every meeting with some boring bureaucrat talking about some minor law that would affect in even more bureaucrats talking about the same stuff was really necessary, seriously what were most laws needed for anyways.

Of, course Jacks was the man of the law, no men would catch him crossing these very important regulations, maybe one man who was probably in the court already and the sole reason he even attended these rather useless quasi-public debates. Which were more like whining about unimportant rules that nobody cared about and nobody would change, but since this nuisance of picky attention seeking excuse of a wizard decided to show up there and somehow convinced people that law about pickles should be replaced; Jacks didn’t even know that it existed and he was sure that empress had not heard about it; but of course the lofty smoothbrained nobles fell for this ridiculous yapping and demanded regulations to be changed and he had to deal with it for weeks, these hours could be spent more usefully. He quickly inspected what was the topic that will ensure that the seats in the court will be warmed for the inconceivable future and that random people will have the feeling they contributed to something. It was about origin of wine, did they want to raise taxes, that would produce the uproar, were they that stupid.

As he sat in his usual chair he scanned the court room, usual bored noblemen were here, some peasants and because the laws were not bad enough already the amateur wizardman was there poising like some expert in whatever they would be talking about because he read a book about it once but if he thought he would let him win he was as usually mistaken. Jacks gave sign so the case may be presented and it was as it turned out that on the outskirts of the Meridian empire had some wine made, fine and well until the Southern empire decided it liked the wine too and now there were issues about the name, should they fight about it or leave it be. Jacks sighed drunkards did not care so why should he. Best to leave this thing be, the merchants would figure it out, perhaps over the bottle of this stupid wine they were now debating about.

“As we have more pressing matters to turn our limited attention to, is in my opinion the best to leave this problem undisturbed, “ Jacks spoke and noticed that half of them were bored out of their mind, the other quarter looked like they would rather drink than to talk about the wine.

And of course, the quasi magician was ready for his next words, which he spoke with annoyed acceptance “If anybody has some objections he may speak now, because further objections would not be heard here. “

This menace has been waiting for this as he cleared his throat and announced “I have an objection your majesty!”

Jacks just gave him a disinterested wave of a hand, because this pesky clown would not get even the little bit of his precious attention.

”I think we already have a very pressing matter to attend to and this is, “ of course he made the dramatic pause, of course he did and making sure everybody had his attention he continued “that the crown prince does not care nor appreciates the hard work, tears and blood which farmers put in production of quality wine!”

He had some audience at least, but Jacks remained calm, so he started with a personal attack too bad.

“Well the fact is not that I do not care for the hardworking wine makers—"he looked around but not in his opponents’ eye and continued “–but unlike others I see the bigger picture. What use it would be if our farmers lands would be stripped from them. It is more important to protect them, than to win some squabble how the wine of the neighbours would be called. “

How would he counter that.

He smirked just little but that only aggravated the Legend more as he took a deep breath and spoke “With all due respect I think that our majesty can’t see the grapevine for the grapes, which is understandable of course because he obviously works a lot but,” now he looked him in the eye as he continued “Because of that he has us here to make sure he does not forget that every little grape matters.”

He took deep breath, so the people would think this was oh so hard for him to say, because he adored and respected the crown prince so much. He adored the crown if it will be on his ugly undeserving head, the prince who is actually worth of praise for dealing with this nuisance of the man without strangling him when he saw him.

All of this was just utter nonsense but the Legend continued, because nonsense was what he is “Our pride, our image is important. You know what the Southern empire would think if we give in? That we are weak, they are just testing our patience, what would be next some of our land, people!?”

Jacks patience was tested he should be going by now but he could not be perceived as weak and neither did lazy nobles as they started to murmur in agreement and the commoners started to look at him funny.

“With all due respect to you fine gentlemen I think you took a wide turn from our topic,“ more like drunk turn, but the attendants were now listening more closely so he had to restrain himself as he continued “this is not the matter of the empires fate, I hope you are not insinuating that our beloved empire is in decline young man, but just the matter of the simple wine.”

Good he put him in his place, which was actually deep underground when he had an option on not saying but doing something.

The man who should be if he had his way presenting his case to some moles, continued “Your suspicions are incorrect an they wound me deeply but nevertheless I shall speak.“

Jacks sighed if only his worlds would hurt the Legend so much he would use them right here and now, the audience be cursed.

Legend made a show of looking sad and then sounding like it “In Vino veritas young prince if you really think that it is the shame, we should taste it, let it be the judge.”

Before Jacks could reply the nonwine master added cheerfully “If your experience lays here of course and not in some other beverage perhaps non-alcoholic.”

Jacks looked him dead in the eye, the audacity of this little magic nobody, he needed the break and apples especially because now the indolent spectators finally showed a hint of interest. They just needed an excuse to get drunk without paying, useless boozers the lot of them. Well that was reckon without one's host because contrary to one very annoying person soaking in his temporary victory he knew how wine tasting usually went: little quantities and a lot of fancy schmancy blabbing right up to Legends alley or should he say bottle. Speaking of bottles, they have arrived accompanied with a bundle of nice little glasses.

He saw that the reason for all of this mess wanted to speak but some noble with elaborate lace collar was quicker “Is our country really so poor that it cannot afford us a decent glass of wine?”

He could hear murmur of agreement swept the room and he saw Legends smile widen a little. Yeah, the country would be really poor if it was run like Legends circus and it would get poor eventually with all this futile bureaucracy, collars and the likes of these slots.

Before anyone could add something he spoke “We are not here to discus the state of empires finances and also not to drain this courts budget—“ he looked Legend in the eye and continued “–but to determine if these two wines are really that different as this gentleman here claims they are. Cheers! “

He pretended to observe both cups cautiously but they looked the same and even the taste was not so much different honestly, well of course an imaginary line would not change the natural circumstances, how surprising. A lot of court seemed to agree plus they got what they wanted or reminder of what they were missing. Legend looked ready to argue but he was past this point by now so without the fuss the conclusion was that they would not press on the wine name issue anymore.
Jacks threw a colescelding look to Legend and left the wannabe court he really deserved the break after being subjected to presence of this nuisance without any option of punching him in the face. But then he noticed a bottle before his office door neatly tied with red ribbon and a shimmering note, subtlety was non-existent for Legend wasn’t it. But he needed to be careful maybe whole thing was charmed with some curse that would made him ditzy, he grabbed a spear and nudged the bottle and in a process the note come undone.

Dear court master non-Legend!
In presence of your tremendous labours in tribunal where you suffered through the flavours much to elaborate to your liking. I present you with Valendas finest beverage. I am assured it would be right to your specific taste.
Sincerely yours,
Wine master Legend

Jacks sighed, the words were elaborately scribed, with little twists and turns like some little girl drunk with glitter made it. So, it was probably this supposedly finest beverage which was spiked wasn’t it? He took a risk and grabbed the bottle and nothing happened and when he opened it nothing came out but a faint smell of apple juice.

All right that’s it, someone is going to die tonight, very important meetings be dammed.
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